Directed by Joe Johnston
Written by Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely
IMDB
I went into this movie not expecting too much. I wasn't expecting to flat-out hate it, so in a way, this movie eclipsed my expectations. I did not like this movie at all. It was boring. There is so much set-up. They roid Captain America up and then make him into a singing, dancing idiot. Then he finds out his bff is a POW and then decides he has to fight. Fuck Captain America, he's nothing but a punk ass bitch.
Seriously though, this movie really is not good. It takes place during WWII and they're fighting some fringe group named "Hydra" that I'm not ever sure are affiliated with the Nazis. The set-up takes so long, which is sort of a problem super hero movies face. Yet, once this movie gets rolling, we are treated to fucking montages of action scenes! I do not want to see a god damned montage when I'm watching a movie like this. I want to see a montage when I'm watching "Revenge of the Nerds" or another stupid/good/campy 80s comedy. An action montage takes a lot of the thrill out of the sequence.
I have no real problem with any of the actors. The Red Skull looks kind of stupid and doesn't even really get that much screen time once he takes his human-face mask off, a very lame reveal. This movie is told in flashback, with the beginning being SHIELD excavating him from ice, and presumably thawing him. The end sees him wake up in the present. For the first half of the movie I kept expecting them to eventually end up in the present. Obviously, this didn't happen. I suppose I cannot really mark a movie down because of that, but I will mark it down for being a bad, boring movie. Not as bad as "Thor."
Also, I would regret ending this review without saying this, a flag painted shield is the dumbest weapon for a super hero. Worse than Wonder Woman's bracelets, lasso of truth or invisible plane. Man, that Wonder Woman sure has accessories!
4.5/10
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